They say running into your ex is a bittersweet moment. In my case, it was all bitter….painfully awkward, embarrassing bitterness. Imagine this….You’re singing the national anthem at the super bowl with millions of people watching, and you forget the lyrics, oh and you’re also naked, and you just bit into a lemon…. thats the awkward bitterness i’m talking about. I probably would of been better off just stabbing her in the face and running away
Sometimes I imagine how much more exciting my life would be if I was the star of The Truman Show, but in this case it would be called The Kevin show? Kuo show? (doesn’t have the same ring to it.) Anyways, everything that I do 24/7, unbeknownst to me, would be broadcasted to millions of peoples homes all around the world! Families, friends, celebrities would faithfully tune in everyday to watch me live my life! Your twitter and Facebook news feeds would be blowing up with rave reviews about this show!….I know exhilarating, right?
But then I start thinking about all the insanely boneheaded and embarrassing things I’ve done or been done to me in the past and I think to myself, do I really want millions of people of see this? For example, the time when my older brother pants me in the deep end of a public swimming pool while there was an Asian family teaching their kid how to swim by the shallow end. But then it gets worse, because I had to strategically find a way to get out of the pool, make my way across the pool area, and pass the group of girls working on their tans just to get to the restroom. In the restroom is where I found my brother flushing my swimming trunks down the toilet, all the while laughing like a bond villain (all part of his diabolical plan to ruin my childhood.) Now that in itself makes a pretty cringe-worthy story, but that wasn’t the worse part because in the midst of my embarrassment and rage, I decided to chase down my older brother, who was making his way back into the pool, to exact my revenge. But it didn’t work out as I planned because I ended up slipping, sliding and then I tripped and fell on my ass….my bare naked ass, which left a nasty scar for weeks. (ever since that incident, I understand the importance of the “no running in the pool area” sign they have at all pools)
There has been countless uncomfortable moments in my life that makes my rethink the whole Truman/Kevin Show idea.
Today I saw a picture of her on FB and I thought to myself meh….now that’s what I call progress.
Thought of you as my mountain top,
Thought of you as my peak.
Thought of you as everything,
I’ve had but couldn’t keep.
Linger on, your pale blue eyes.